hell on heels

Dear Hayden,

I really miss you, a lot. I really can’t remember the last time I talked to you. It’s been awhile, and I really do miss our friendship. Yes, everyone and their mother knew I was absolutely in love with you in high school, but I did consider you to be one of my best friends. I miss the talks, I miss the texts, I miss the sarcasm, I just really miss you. I don’t know why we stopped talking, but maybe we can start. I would really like that.

Love, Becca

Today is one of those days that I want to do nothing but I have about a million things to do. I need to clean my room because its nasty, and I have 2 homework assignments due tomorrow anddd I have to babysit. Dammit, why couldn’t I just do nothing all day!!!

I seriously need to start working out again. I’m so mad our gym is closed for renovations. :(

I also wanna start dancing again. Hollllla

Dear Taylor Swift (do not make fun of me),

I just really would like to be your best friend. I think we would really get along. I’m being completely serious. And not to mention you helped me stay sane during my breakup through your Fearless CD. Thank you :)

Love, 

Becca Lynn

I just woke up, and my eye is very itchy. I don’t want to go to class today. But when my sister comes home at 1:15, we’re gonna watch gossip girl season 3 on dvd all day, and all night. So excited :) 

So reading about serial killers before bed should be a bad idea, but it doesn’t phase me. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME!? God, I’m nuts.

I don’t have any internet only friends. I have real life friends that I talk to on the internet because I’m cool like that.

I’m not exactly sure this is a good idea, but uhm here goes nothing.

Dear Matthew,

I don’t really know where to begin with you since we’ve been through this a million times. You were my first love. I never knew how to love until you came, and I never really knew how much I loved you until you were gone. When you left, a part of me left with you. My whole world turned upside down. I was left broken, with no reason behind any of it. You just didn’t want me anymore. It hurt, and it still hurts now. You left me with a gaping hole in my chest, and I don’t know how in the world any one will be able to fill it the way you did. You brought me laughter and joy and happiness, and I haven’t felt it since you’ve been gone. I honestly, truly thought we’d be together for the rest of our lives. I thought nothing could come between us. What we had was real and I will never, ever forget it. One day, I really hope we can reconnect, as friends or maybe something more. I just want you in my life again. You brought out the best in me, and I hope one day, that part of me can come back. I will love you forever, no matter what. I could fill an entire book with what I have to say to you but in all honesty, I really do just wish for your happiness.

Love, 

Rebecca